Now, for your viewing confusion, I present a list of things overheard this past weekend while at Sci-Fi On The Rock. There are no points of reference, no clarification and no explanation for anything said. It can all be taken Out of CONtext.

To quote a friend of mine; “Names have been kept the same to reflect the strange…”

My Weight Loss and Health Update

Ok real talk here, so if you're tired of my health updates, I'm going to rehash a lot of ground in this update so you might want to skip this one.

Two years ago, I was ignorant of some pretty major things in my life. I was fat, huge, morbidly obese even and I was pretty unhealthy.

I've had a long history of knowing I was overweight, but I always found a way to reason it out. I could take stairs two at a time, I could move faster and more easily than a person my size should have been able to do, I didn't have any severe aches or pains, I had no trouble getting out of bed, or fitting into cars. I saw people daily who were bigger than me, so I wasn't bad off.

I ate shitty foods, I ate in huge amounts, it was a matter of pride that I could eat an average person's weight at a buffet. I picked up an order at Old Town Pizza one night and the counter girl saw the name on the order and said "You're Steve!" her voice filled with awe that I was real. Pretty sure I put the owners kids through college.

Then two things happened to change my world. 

Day One

This morning sucked.

The last two months sucked.

Let me explain.

For close on two years now, I've been on a mission to be active, eat healthy and lose weight. I've been doing well. From 398 lbs when I started, to 320 as of June 29th (July weigh in pending).  Progress has been slow and steady, with only one plateau so far. Then mid May I hit a wall.

Here comes the storm again.

****Tap Tap... Tap Tap****

We're back to this again are we? All I asked for was a little light next to the microphone switch that's on when the microphone is on, and off when it's off. Is that really so hard to do? Look where, ahead? There's nothing there but a big lit up sign that says On The Air... wait... Dammit!

5 years of Weathery Goodness

**My gods, this broadcast room is a mess. Dust everywhere, is that a cobweb or a spiderweb? Does the cleaning service ever come in here when I'm away? Well there's still power in here anyway, I can see one blinking light on the board... dammit!**

For the future of Science!

**Yes, yes I’m going to tell them now. No! I’m not changing my mind about this, it has to be done for the greater good! (echo: the greater good) Now cut that out! I swear if you eggheads spent as much time actually doing work around here as you do watching movies, I’d have a studio setup that worked flawlessly and this light would be reliable! What? It’s on? Dammit not again! **

A storm's a comin'

What have you guys been doing? This place is a mess, where's the damn switch in here? You've all been throwing parties while I'm gone, but can't clean up? Peanut brittle, candycorn, panties, ... a traffic cone? Really? Where did that come from? Hey the light works now? Wait.. Dammit!

Personally Identified

January 18th, 2017

Gather round one and all as I regale you with a textual re enactment of a strange little happening, once again at *hotel*

The cast for tonight’s dramatization are as follows;

The character of Steve (Me), played by yours truly
The character of Person One (P1), played by Random Person
The character of Person Two (P2), played by Other Random Person

Person one approaches the ATM, presumably to withdraw some funds. They insert their card and look perplexed as they read the screen.

P1: “It’s asking for my personal number, what’s that?”

P2: “Have you got numbers on your accounts?”

P1: “I dunno, what’s a personal number?”

P2: “What’s it asking?”

P1: “It wants a personal number. I know my PIN but what’s a personal number?”

Me: “PIN stands for Personal Identification Number, it’s asking for your PIN.”

P1 & P2: “Oh.”

Me: “....”

-FIN-

Boom go the Fireworks

So CBC ran a story about a St. John's City councilor who is taking a stance on Fireworks, to show his constituents that he's doing something. But he also said the City's hands are tied when it comes to the use of Fireworks.

Now I'm just an average idiot with access to Google to search things out and it only took me about five minutes to find the City of St. John's By Laws. You think a City Councilor would be able to look these up as well....

Weather Machine Blues

*tap tap* *pfffft*

This thing on? What the hell happened to the little light we had? Well change the freakin' blub for cryin' out loud! What am I paying you for any way? I'm not? Yes I am. Oh, I'm on? ... Dammit!